Words of Determination by James Dean

I never told this to anyone else. Guess I always thought they'd think I was crazy, so I just kept it to myself. But I think I can trust you. Have you ever had the feeling that it's not in your hands? Do you every just know you've got something to do and you have no control over it? See, all I know is, I've got to do something. I don't know exactly what it is yet, but when the time comes, I'll know. I've got to keep trying until I hit the right button. See what I mean? It's like, I know I want to be an actor, but that isn't it. That's not all. Just being an actor or a director, even a good one, isn't enough. There's got to be more than just that. I figure there's nothing you can't do if you put everything you've got into it. The only thing that stops people from getting what they want is themselves. They put too many barriers in their paths. It's like they're afraid to succeed. In a way, I guess I know why. There's a terrific amount of responsibility that goes with success, the greater the success, the greater the responsibility. But I think, if you're not afraid, if you take everything you are, everything worthwhile in you, and direct it at one goal, one ultimate mark; you've got to get there. If you start accepting the world, letting things happen to you, around you, things will happen like you never dreamed. That's why I am going to stick to this thing. I don't want to be just a good actor. I don't even want to be just the best. I want to grow and grow, grow so tall that nobody can reach me. Not to prove anything, but just to go where you ought to go when you devote your whole self and all you are into one thing. Maybe this sounds crazy or egocentric or something, but I think there's only one true form of greatness for a man. If a Man can bridge that gap between life and death, I mean, if he can live on after he's dead, then maybe he was a great man. When they talk about success, they talk about reaching the top. But there is no top. You've got to go on and on, NEVER STOP AT ANY POINT. To me, the only success, the only true greatness for a man lies in immortality. To have your work remembered in history, to leave something in this world that will last for generations, centuries even. That's greatness. I want to grow away from all this crap. You know the pathetic little world we exist in. I want to leave it all behind, all the petty thoughts about the unimportant little things that'll be forgotten a hundred years from now anyway. There's a level somewhere where everything is solid and important. I am going to try to reach up there and find a place I know is pretty close to perfect, a place where this whole messy world should be, could be, if it'd just take the time to learn. Well, then, there, now...guess I shot my wad. Anyway, now you know what a nut I am. - James Byron Dean, age 20, 1950.